


Right Here Waiting

by 100ottersonaplane



Category: Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015)
Genre: Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-01
Updated: 2016-02-01
Packaged: 2018-05-16 02:03:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 11,723
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5809240
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/100ottersonaplane/pseuds/100ottersonaplane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eggsy knew he shouldn’t be down here; it was the middle of the night and he was expected to be in his bed. If he were caught, the punishment would be severe, and would begin with facing Merlin's ire directly.</p>
<p>Bloody fucking hell, that man was proper fucking terrifying. He was a force truly not to be reckoned with under any regular circumstances, nevermind if he was cross. If Merlin discovered Eggsy was down here, he would certainly be right bloody well pissed off and Eggsy's body involuntarily shuddered at the thought.</p>
<p>Eggsy was absolutely tempting fate and risking limb, and quite possibly his life, here.</p>
<p>But here he was anyway. This is where Harry was.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [AnnaofAza](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnaofAza/gifts).



> Gift for the 2015-16 Winter Hartwin Secret Santa

* * *

Wherever you go  
Whatever you do  
I will be right here waiting for you.  
Whatever it takes  
Or how my heart breaks  
I will be right here waiting for you.

* * *

 

Eggsy knew he shouldn’t be down here; it was the middle of the night and he was expected to be in his bed. If he were caught, the punishment would be severe, and would begin with facing Merlin's ire directly.

_Bloody fucking hell_ , that man was proper fucking terrifying. He was a force truly  _not_ to be reckoned with under any regular circumstances, nevermind if he was cross. If Merlin discovered Eggsy was down here, he would certainly be right bloody well pissed off and Eggsy's body involuntarily shuddered at the thought.

Eggsy was absolutely tempting fate and risking limb, and quite possibly his life, here.

But here he was anyway. This is where Harry was.

He should be in the dorm, fast asleep like the rest of the candidates, but he couldn’t leave this chair. Merlin's wrath or no, he couldn't leave. He certainly couldn’t sleep, hadn’t really since a week ago when he’d come into see Harry and all Merlin could do to reassure him that his mentor, his friend, _his Harry_ would be okay was to tell him there was hope.

_Hope. Bloody fuckin’ hope. Fuckin’ waste of time._

Eggsy had found Merlin later that same day. They’d been dismissed for the rest of the evening and Eggsy had sought him out, down in the depths of the mansion.

Merlin had looked only slightly surprised to see him in the door to his lab.

“Everything okay, Eggsy?”

“Do _you_ think he’ll wake up?” Eggsy asked before he could talk himself out of it. “I mean there’s hope and then there’s _hope._ Which do you have?”

Merlin had simply looked at him for a moment, clipboard held against his chest.

“I trust you,” Eggsy had continued with an airy chuckle. “Despite the probably dozen reasons I shouldn’t- mate that trick with the fake grenade was fuckin’ awful- I want you to tell me the truth, please. Do you have _hope_?”

Merlin considered Eggsy carefully and it was all Eggsy could do not to squirm. Or run away. His desire to know what Merlin thought, if he had the right sort of _hope_ kept him rooted to the spot.

“He is a stubborn bastard. I think he’ll come ‘round and then fuss because he looks awful. If he has a beard, god help us all. Harry’s a peacock, he is. And he’ll have to complain about not having tea.”

Eggsy laughed but it was a wet, teary sort of sound.

“Lad,” Merlin said and his face had softened in compassion. “I have every faith that the bastard is going to come back to us. He’s not going to go out like this. We just have to be patient, alright?”

Eggsy nodded, stepped back and straightened his shoulders. He’d make Harry proud. He’d become – something- a man worthy of being with Harry, in whatever way the older man would have him. He _would_ keep the man in his life no matter how or in what capacity that ended up being.

Here in the infirmary, Eggsy knew the harsh reality- that hope was rather fucking useless. He had hoped for a lot of things: for his father to come home, his Mum to find a decent man, Dean to leave their lives, Daisy to grow up out of the estates, and absolutely fuck-all had happened.

Hope was for those people who weren’t him. He couldn’t rely on hope to bring back one of the most important people in his life. But what else could he do? There was nothing he could do but wait and worry.

Wait, worry, repeat.

Wait, worry, repeat.

So, maybe, maybe a little hope wouldn’t hurt, right?

Eggsy was afraid and quite a bit loathe to admit he was hoping with everything he had, against all odds, maybe once, just this once, he’d not be disappointed.

Though Eggsy willingly admitted to himself, in the loneliness of the darkened infirmary room, losing Harry wouldn’t be disappointment. It would be complete devastation.

He _couldn’t_ lose Harry, not when there was so much he wanted from the man.

Sure he wanted to snog the man within an inch of his life, peel him out of those bespoke suits and absolutely _wreck_ him, but that wasn't all. Eggsy wanted so much more.

Christ help him, he wanted _so_ much more.

He wanted to explore the pull between them, to explore the long lingering glances shared between them, and the fact that Harry called him dear boy with such pleasure that it made Eggsy giddy.

What was Harry’s favorite music? Where did each and every scar on his body come from? What was his biggest dream as a child? Did he have nice parents who loved him right? What were all the things Eggsy could do to make Harry’s brown eyes crinkle around the edges and the corners of his mouth to curl up in that wry smile? How did Harry like to kiss or be kissed- did he go after it in the same capacity he did a fight, all dominance and strength or did he like to be led? Did Harry have any fears? How did he like his eggs?

Eggsy wanted to eat Harry’s boasted Sunday roast and help with the dishes, dancing around each other like they’d done it all their lives. He wanted to be there when Harry was sick to bring him soup and tissues, and kiss his forehead to try and soothe away the aches. He wanted to know how Harry’s skin tasted in the morning, in the afternoon, in the middle of the night. He wanted to spoil and protect Harry (the fact Harry was a terrifically efficient spy and likely wouldn’t need much physical protection notwithstanding.) He wanted to see Harry with bedhead. He wanted to see Harry on the floor, having a tea-party with Daisy. He wanted to fall asleep face pressed into Harry's chest, listening to his heartbeat.

Eggsy wanted to know how to make the man laugh over and over again.

_Oh, Harry’s laugh._

Eggsy smiled in the dark medical room and recalled the first time he’d heard the man laugh.

Three days after nearly having drowned in the dorm, they had been all secretly sent off to speak with their mentors for private lessons and Eggsy had barged into Harry’s office, holding his arms out like a bird.

“Why am I in a tartan onesie?” He’d asked Harry, incensed. “Like, seriously, mate, is this how snobs dress because I ain’t eva seen this on anyone above the age of free.”

Harry, sitting at his desk in the middle of pouring out two cups of tea, stopped and looked at him over the top of his glasses.

Eggsy had given him the angriest look one could pull off in a tartan jumpsuit. It had seemingly given him the acutely opposite look he was going for because Harry had calmly set the teapot down, dropped his head back and laughed.

Oh, Eggsy had fallen hard for that sound- a deep rich thing that filled the room with warmth and light and made Eggsy feel like he could take on the world if just to hear it again.

It was at that moment as well, watching Harry’s mirth filled eyes pin him with a _fondness_ and a sort of simmering _heat_ which _should_ have made Eggsy squirm but did not, Eggsy realized he wanted to see Harry look at him like that all the time. He wanted to make Harry happy.

Then Harry had gone and gotten blown up. Or blown himself up. Or some shit like that- honestly he hadn’t really listened after Merlin had uttered the words ‘Harry’ ‘blown up’ and ‘coma' all in a row.

Harry had just fucking been blown up somehow and left Eggsy alone with not only the realization that he wanted to make Harry happy, but also understanding he wanted nothing less than to love the man in the way Harry deserved.

Completely, utterly, bloody arse over tea-kettle for Harry, he was.

_Fuck me sideways and call me screwed. I am in deep shit._

Here he was, sitting in this damn infirmary, _hoping_ against everything that Harry would come back, come back to the world, to Kingsman, to _him_. He could sit here and _hope_ Harry would want him in the same way but dammit, if he was going to subject himself to the painful act of hoping for anything, first and foremost it was going to be having Harry back in the world of the living, healthy. After that, the rest would either stack up or fall down but the world, Eggsy, wouldn't, no  _couldn't_ , be down a Harry Hart.

Eggsy hoped and hoped and hoped more, curled up in the chair next to Harry’s bed, watching as Harry’s heart monitor blipped steadily and the ventilator rose and fell Harry’s chest in measured breaths. He allowed himself to imagine that perhaps this time would be different than all the rest because he wasn't sending his hope up to some deity he'd long since stopped believing in, he was asking Harry, the one person in his life he truly trusted.

_Please be okay. Please come back. Please, Harry. I need you.  
_

“Please,” Eggsy whispered aloud for the first time into the dark air. He flinched at the pleading in his voice but continued on. “Please don’t leave me, Harry. I think I might love you and I- I want to… god there’s so much I want to do. I don’t care if you don’t want me like that- just… just don’t leave me. I’ll take you in any way I can get, yeah? So please. Harry, I need you. Just don’t leave me.”

He dozed off and on, his hand lying on the cold sheets, inches away from Harry’s.

“I’ll be back,” he said to Harry when it was time to sneak back to the dorm before Merlin found his bed empty. “I’ll be back, Harry. I don’t know when, but I’ll be back, yeah? Please keep fightin’.”

Eggsy walked out of the room with his heart down in his feet. He made it back to the dorm and let out the breath he’d been holding as he slid in between his sheets. He hadn’t been caught. Sure he was good at sneaking around but for the love of Christ, he was in a building full of _fucking spies._ He had to chalk up the fact that he had been unseen and unobserved on his way to Harry’s room a little bit too lucky for his blood. He couldn’t go back, not for a while.  Eggsy couldn’t risk getting booted from Kingsman and then never knowing what happened to Harry so he simply pushed himself to stay away from Harry’s infirmary room.

And bloody hell, he shuddered to think of what Merlin would do. Eggsy wasn’t dumb enough to tempt fate in regards to the Scotsman. Any guy willing to flood an entire room of young people was not a man to be trifled with. Seriously, the man was just fuckin’ terrifying.

It was nearly impossible to stay away. Most nights Eggsy lay awake, thinking about Harry down in the infirmary, alone, sick, and Eggsy would nearly work himself up into fits. He used the excess adrenaline worrying about Harry provided to throw himself into the obstacles and tests Merlin hurled at them. But he knew he couldn’t hold out forever; he was only human

It was only a matter of time before he caved and went back to Harry.


	2. Chapter 2

He lasted a month and half before the desire to see Harry again won over.

Merlin hadn’t been involved in their training for nearly a week after being involved daily. It wasn’t something that alarmed the other recruits, they seemed relieved. (Until Percival stepped in and then they all were certain they’d died and been sent to hell where Satan wore a plaid bespoke suit and read novels while forcing their muscles to explode.) But Eggsy had seen Merlin earlier that afternoon looking as though he hadn’t slept in _days._ Worry spiked in Eggsy’s gut, hard and heavy.

 _What if something had happened to Harry? Fucking hell_.

Eggsy waited until all of the recruits were snoring away in their beds before he made a move. He slid out of his bed, careful not to dislodge JB from his perch at the foot. The clock in the hall read 10:15. Spy recruits led a hard life. He padded out of the room, socked feet silent on the hard concrete floors. He took the halls carefully, looking around each corner, ducking into the shadows when the scarce agent passed by.

All in all, it was once again relatively easy to reach the infirmary unseen.

_Yes!_

He had just closed the door when he heard the footsteps coming down the hall behind him.

_Fuck!_

He hadn’t even gotten to _see_ Harry! He ran for the linen closet, contorting his body into the space at the bottom. He’d just closed himself in when someone walked into the infirmary. There was silence for a moment before another set of footsteps entered and the door clicked closed.

“Evening, Arthur,” Merlin’s Scottish brogue greeted.

“Any change?”

“He’s breathing well on his own,” Merlin answered. “Since Morgana took the ventilator last night, so far he’s been really holding his own.”

Arthur grunted in what Eggsy thought sounded like indifference. He bit his knuckle to stop himself from making any noise.

“Keep me posted, Merlin. We need him back in the field soon,” Arthur said and was gone.

_Prick._

“Bloody insensitive prick,” Merlin mumbled. Eggsy bit his finger again to stop himself from laughing.

Eggsy assumed Merlin would leave soon after Arthur but no. Another set of footsteps, these wearing heels, and then a soft woman’s voice.

“Merlin, please stop looking like your dog’s been shot,” she said gently. “He’s in no more danger than he was with the ventilator. He’s actually in less danger of infection without that bloody tube. I’m pleased with his numbers. His blood oxygen is higher than I’d expected which is nothing but a good sign. He’ll come ‘round when he’s ready.”

“Morgana, his brain activity…” Merlin began.

“Isn’t cause for concern,” Morgana said firmly. “He’s not had any significant drops. The increase is because he’s being asked to do more on his own. It’s not going to send him spiraling.”

“We almost lost him.”

Eggsy nearly retched. He knew it, logically. The man had been blown up but hearing it out loud sent Eggsy’s heart diving into his stomach, beating wildly.

_No. No. No!_

“Yes,” Morgana said. “But we didn’t. He’s well on his way, Conall. I know he’s your best mate but you’ll soon be in a bed here if you don’t get some food and actual rest. Don’t make me order it. I will happily sedate you and then film you drooling onto the floor. I hear there’s a pretty lady recruit that might enjoy…”

Eggsy grinned. He had seen the looks Merlin gave Roxy and figured the Scot was crushing on his mate. Now he _knew_ it. He couldn’t wait to tell Roxy. Merlin’s gulping swallow could be heard from Eggsy's hiding place across the room and his grin widened.

“Aye,” Merlin agreed. “Aye, I’ll get some rest. Jesus Christ, you’re ruthless.”

“I have had years of practice dealing with agents stubborn enough to make the two of you look like nothing more than insolent toddlers. The ruthlessness is just a natural state now.” Her voice softened. “We’ll get him back soon enough. Then the two of you can hiss and growl at each other as you usually do.”

Her heels clicked across the floor, Eggsy guessed she was checking on Harry.

“I’m very pleased,” she said. “I’ve got no worries, Conall. He’ll need some therapy and he’s going to be sorely upset at the fact that his arse isn’t leaving that bed until I am satisfied he won’t put himself right back in it. But he’ll be back to us and giving us all headaches soon. Get some rest.”

“Aye, I will.”

She left but Merlin remained.

The chair legs squeaked along the floor and Eggsy realized that Merlin was going to be there a while. He settled himself in, prepared to wait. Hiding in a cramped space wasn’t new to Eggsy, what with a step father like Dean. After all, hiding had become second nature to Eggsy at a young age. This would be okay.

 

It fucking wasn’t okay.

Eggsy legs had gone to sleep and he was nearly crawling out of his skin with boredom and the desire to see Harry when the lights in the room finally clicked off and Merlin’s footsteps faded away. He waited another five minutes before he climbed out of the closet, nearly falling down as the blood returned to his legs in a static rush. He stumbled to the chair, still warm from Merlin’s body heat, and collapsed into it.

Eggsy’s eyes trailed up past the beard growth and straight to Harry’s mouth. The sight of Harry without the ventilator took all thoughts of Eggsy’s painful legs away. Harry’s chest rose and fell on his own, no mechanical whoosh accompanying it. Just soft rhythmic exhales and inhales. A small oxygen cannula lay under his nose but Harry was breathing on his own.

Tears welled up and blurred the sight.

“You’re doing so well,” Eggsy breathed wetly. “Harry, you’re nearly back to me. Come on a little more, yeah? Just a bit more and then I can make you laugh. I can see what we’re going to be. I can show you how much I’ve done since you’ve been sleepin’, yeah?”

He allowed himself to touch Harry for the first time. It had always felt wrong but now it felt like it was supposed to happen. He cupped the cool flesh of Harry’s hand underneath his palm. He gripped it carefully, rolling it over in his hand to run his fingertip over the lines of Harry’s skin.

“Oh, Harry,” Eggsy breathed. "Please.”                                      

Eggsy rested his head on the edge of the bed and held onto Harry’s hand, relishing in the sounds of Harry’s soft breaths. He began softly humming a song his Mum used to sing him as a lullaby. It soon turned to soft singing.

“When I wake up, well I know I’m gonna be the man that wakes up next to you. And when I go out, yeah I know I’m gonna be the man that goes along with you. And when I come home, yeah I know I’m gonna be the man that’s coming home to you. And when I’m dreamin’, well I know I’m gonna dream about the time when I’m with you. And I would walk five hundred miles and I would walk five hundred more, just to be the man who walked a thousand mile to fall down at your door.

He sat there for hours, listening to Harry’s breathing, singing softly until he ran out of songs and his throat began to hurt. When the clock ticked over to 4:30, though he did not want to, he knew he had to leave.

“You’re really gonna hate that beard,” Eggsy said with a chuckle as he walked away. “Oh you’re going to have a fuckin’ coronary. Just a bit more, Harry,” he asked from the doorway. “Come back to me, yeah?”

 

Roxy was awake, sitting on his bed petting JB when he returned to the dorm just after five in the morning. The other recruits were still sleeping soundly.

Eggsy expected her to fuss at him, tell him he was going to get thrown out or something along those lines, but he could see even from the dim light from the showers that her eyes were soft.

“You alright?” She whispered.

“Yeah,” Eggsy answered. “I- I’m alright.”

“You don’t really look alright,” Roxy said. She scooped up JB and pressed him into his arms. The little dog cuddled up underneath his chin, sighing contentedly. “He woke up a few hours ago and tried to find you. Fell right off the bed.”

Eggsy kissed the top of the dog’s head in apology.

“Where did you go?” She paused and considered Eggsy. “You’re not hurt are you?”

“Ah, Rox,” Eggsy said with a wink. “Didn’t think there was enough care for me after all of it for Merlin.”

“Shut up, you dork,” Roxy said with a playful shove. “You’re my mate. We’ve got to keep an eye out for each other.”

“I went to see Harry,” Eggsy said, burying his face into JB’s neck.

“Oh, _Eggsy_.”

“I can’t give up on him. I want him in me life, even if he- well if he doesn’t…”

“If he doesn’t he’s a fool,” Roxy nearly growled.

“Easy,” Eggsy laughed. “I ain’t gonna hold it against him for not wantin’ a pleb like me.”

“You’re an idiot,” Roxy said. “He’d be bloody lucky to have you. I'll kick his fuckin' arse if he doesn't treat you well.”

“As Merlin would be to have you,” Eggsy couldn’t help but say. "And thanks, bruv. He'd be runnin' for the hills."

“Damn right. And please,” Roxy scoffed. They both looked around to make sure no one had stirred at the noise. “Merlin doesn’t… what?” She cocked her head in confusion  at Eggsy’ gleeful expression.

“Merlin was down there. Morgana threatened to show you unflattering video and he caved.”

“What?” Roxy hissed, grabbing Eggsy’s arm not holding JB. “Are you joking?”

“No,” Eggsy soothed and allowed her to pull him onto his bed. “No, she threatened and I quote ‘I will happily sedate you and then film you drooling onto the floor. I hear there’s a pretty lady recruit that might enjoy’ and that got Merlin going. Yous the only lady recruit we’ve got, doll. Merlin’s got himself a crush on ya.”

“Well fuck me,” Roxy breathed in a grin.

“I won’t, but maybe Merlin will.”

The bruise the blossomed on Eggsy’s bicep from her punch was so worth the blushing embarrassment that flooded his best mate’s face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 'I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)' by Sleeping At Last [ here ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yJ6wJqaE6o4)


	3. Chapter 3

Two days later

Eggsy slid the almost too fat to fit JB into the front pocket of his still god awful fucking jumpsuit and slunk down the hall. He listened at the door, dropping to his knees to check under the gap. No one was in.

_Perfect._

Eggsy pushed the door open, hand absentmindedly scratching JB’s ears.

Harry was there, still reclined in the bed, nasal cannula in place and heart monitor blipping evenly. But there was a distinct difference this time. Harry's eyes were _open_. He rolled his head and a smile nearly split is face in half at the sight of Eggsy.

Eggsy nearly collapsed. It was the best thing he’d _ever_ seen. And he’d just seen JB chase a fuckin’ butterfly outside.

“Hello, dear boy,” Harry said. His voice was raspy, weak from weeks of disuse and a ventilator shoved down his throat. “You are a sight for sore eyes.”

Eggsy was by his side in an instant, eyes tracing every feature of the man’s face. He looked exhausted with pained eyes, and the beard was a bit much, but he was _awake_. He was _here with Eggsy._ Harry’s hands trembled against the sheets. Eggsy stared at them, unsure of how to remember how to talk and breathe at the same time.

“Eggsy?” Harry asked after minutes had gone by. “Dear boy, are you alright?”

“Yeah,” Eggsy said and shook himself out of his stupor. Breathing and talking separated back into easy things and he smiled. “Just- I am so glad you’re back, Harry.”

“Me too,” Harry said. He lifted a shaking hand and reached for Eggsy’s hand. Eggsy took it with a wide smile and sat down on the edge of the mattress. His entire body felt comfortably warm as though he’d just ingested hot chocolate in front of a roaring fire.

“How’re you feeling?” He asked. “Are you alright?”

“Like I got blown up,” Harry said with a soft smile. “And Christ, my face itches from this infernal beard. But, I am better now that you’re here. Fill me in, dear boy. Is- is that a pug in your pocket?” he asked, nodding toward JB’s little head sticking out of his pocket.

“Yeah, this is JB,” he said, pulling the tubby little pug out. “You could tell he was a pug too?”

“Yes,” Harry said, amusement evident. “When you picked him were you under the impression it was something else?” JB squeaked a bark out at Harry, sniffing the hand holding Eggsy’s.

“A bulldog,” Eggsy groused. “I thought it was a bulldog. Please tell me he’ll grow into his head.”

Harry took another look at Eggsy’s unamused face before glancing down at JB, tongue lolling out of his mouth with a goofy dog grin on his face and began laughing.

_Oh, that sound. Fuck me. That sound._

The warmth increased tenfold and Eggsy sighed. He positively reveled in the fact that Harry was here with him, laughing. Christ, it was surreal.

_Harry's here and he's fucking laughing again. Bloody hell, have I died and gone to heaven?_

The laughs turned into coughs but Harry soon got them under control and Eggsy was able to stop the panic blooming under his ribs.

“Oh I have missed you, dear boy,” Harry said when he got his breath back. “Why did you decide on the name JB?”

“Jack Bauer,” Eggsy said with a shrug and a slight blush. “Thought it was fittin’.”

“Before or after you discovered the little thing was a pug?”

“Before,” Eggsy said, scratching the small dog. “But I wasn't gonna change it. I loved Bauer. Used to save up me spendin’ money to get the DVDs.”

“Might I hold him?” Harry asked. He was allowing JB to bat at his fingers playfully.

“‘Course!” Eggsy handed over the small pug into Harry’s shaking grasp. The older man brought the small dog up to his chest, using his free arm to support the dog’s rump.

JB stared at Harry for a moment before letting out a small yip and licking the tip of Harry’s nose.

“Oi, JB!”

“It’s alright,” Harry said, chuckling. “I don’t mind.” JB seemed satisfied with Harry and proceeded to curl up on his chest, sighing as he got comfortable.

“Seems like I might have some competition now. He don’t ever sleep with anyone but me.”

“I promise to return him. Tell me, dear boy, how are you? Have you made any friends?”

“I’m great,” Eggsy replied. “Everyfing hurts all the time but I’m gettin’ stronger so it’s not too bad. Most of the rest are snobs but Roxy. She’s fantastic, Harry! She’s got a poodle named Arnold and that thing is already listenin’ ten times better than that little shit on your chest.”

Harry smiled as Eggsy regaled stories of Roxy, of Merlin’s terrifying ability to sneak up out of nowhere and the time he showed up behind Digby as he was makin’ fun of a disabled person. Digby had disappeared for an entire day. They’d all been convinced he’d died. He came back covered in mud and frozen nearly blue. He wouldn’t speak of where he’d been or what he’d been forced to do. No one honestly wanted to know.

Harry listened intently for a while but it became clear that he was fighting to stay awake. The hand that had holding Eggsy’s was twitching with the effort of staying awake and holding on.

“Don’t fight it,” Eggsy said, squeezing Harry’s hand. “Harry, it’s alright. Sleep.”

“I’ve done enough of that,” Harry murmured. “Don’t want to leave you just yet. I’m- I’m not ready.”

“Harry,” Eggsy said, “You ain’t leavin’ me. Yous just going to get some rest, alright? You need it. I’ll be back here before you know it. Go on,” Eggsy said. “Sleep.”

“Dear boy,” Harry said, fondness saturating his sleepy gaze. “My dear boy.”

Harry drifted off in seconds.

“Your boy,” Eggsy said gently. "In whatever way you'll have me, Harry."

He gathered up JB and snuck back out.

_Harry is okay. He's going to be okay.  
_

Eggsy’s couldn't stop smiling and hand stayed warm all evening and long into the night.


	4. Chapter 4

Three days later

Eggsy couldn’t get back to Harry until well after nightfall three days later. He handed JB off to Roxy and padded down the hall again, taking a different route so if he got caught it wasn’t obvious where he was going. He was getting braver but not stupider.

The light in the room was on but dimmed and Eggsy saw Harry’s eyes were open. Harry didn’t startle at the appearance of Eggsy in his room. He simply looked over at him. Concern flooded his face.

“Eggsy, dear boy, are you alright?”

“Yeah,” Eggsy said, walking over to the bed. “I’m alrigh’.”

“It’s the middle of the night,” Harry said, voice deepening in distress. “What’s the matter?”

“I just wanted to check on you and I haven’t had a chance until now. Didn’ expect you to be awake.”

Eggsy frowned at the dark circles under Harry’s bloodshot eyes. “You’re lookin’ a bit rough. You sure you’re alright?”

“It isn’t anything nefarious,” Harry said, words tumbling out quickly. “Morgana told me to expect it. My body is attempting to regulate its internal clock and it just happens to be doing it all wrong. My brain is overcompensating with thoughts and scenarios and I just can’t seem to sleep. They cannot give me any sedatives because of the coma and injury... I didn’t- I didn’t expect it to throw me this badly,” Harry said, tears catching in his throat. “I am so tired, Eggsy. I just want to sleep.”

Eggsy relaxed a tiny bit hearing there wasn’t something horribly wrong with Harry but the tears broke his heart. He knew what the feeling was like- being so tired you couldn't function but unable to fall asleep. You fell into a loop of despair where you felt too tight in your own skin and the world felt too large. He needed to help, he just wasn’t sure how.

“What can I do?” He grabbed Harry’s hand and began gently warming the cold appendage in between his own.

“I don’t know,” Harry sniffled. “I don’t know, Eggsy.”

They sat in relative silence, the only sound was Harry’s rapidly escalating breaths.

“Eggsy,” he cried gently. “ _Eggsy_.”

“What can I do, Harry?” Eggsy was close to tears himself. “What can I do?”

“I don’t know,” Harry admitted. “ _I don’t know. Oh god, I just want to sleep_.” A sob escaped him and he rolled onto his side, facing away from Eggsy. He buried his face into his hands and began to cry in earnest.

“Oh, no, Harry. Don’t do that,” Eggsy said. He climbed up onto the edge of the bed, curling his body around Harry’s protectively. “Don’t cry, Harry. Shh, breathe.”

Harry pulled away and Eggsy nearly protested before he realized Harry was rolling over to bury his face into Eggsy’s neck. He guided Harry’s arm, carefully mindful of the IV,  to wrap around him. It was the right move because Harry tightened his grip and held Eggsy to him as though he were the only thing preventing Harry from drowning.

Harry trembled in his arms and Eggsy felt utterly helpless.

_How can I fix this? Fuck, how do I fix this?_

“Breathe, Harry,” Eggsy instructed. “Tha’s it. Breathe. We’ll get this sorted, don’t you worry. Settle in. Yeah. There we go, tha’s betta.”

Harry loosened his grip somewhat and slid down the bed to recline onto Eggsy more comfortably. Eggsy ran one hand up and down Harry’s back, fingers bumping over the vertebrae in Harry’s spine, while the other gently thumbed away the tears tracking down Harry’s cheekbones before they could settle into his beard. He softly hummed lullabies he'd sung to Daisy. Harry slowly calmed.

“I’m sorry,” Harry whispered a bit later. His nose was clogged and his voice raspy but there was no mistaking the embarrassment creeping in.

“It’s alright,” Eggsy soothed. “No need to be sorry. What else can I do?”

“Stay?” Harry asked timidly.

“'Course,” Eggsy agreed. “Let’s move though ‘cuz me arms gone to sleep.”

They ended up semi-reclined in the bed, Harry tucked under Eggsy’s arm, not on top of it, with his face pressed into Eggsy’s collarbone. His long arm stayed across Eggsy, anchoring them together. Harry’s beard prickled Eggsy’s skin but he simply couldn’t find it in him to care.

Eggsy reached over for a tissue and noticed the book abandoned on the table. “Whatcha readin’?”

“Thank you. The House of Seven Gables,” Harry said, wiping at his nose. “Or I was trying to. I can’t read for more than a minute or two at a time before I get dizzy.”

“Oh, want me to read some to ya?” Eggsy asked. “Maybe it’ll help you get to sleep?”

“That would be wonderful.” He sounded close to tears again and Eggsy’s heart nearly broke in two.

Without thinking about it, Eggsy ran his hand through Harry’s hair. Harry’s eyes dropped closed instantly. Eggsy combed his fingers through Harry’s locks, scratching at the scalp gently. He leaned over to grab the book just out of his reach with his free hand and Harry jerked, grabbing for him.

“Easy. Just gettin’ the book.” He petted Harry softly until he calmed again before he opened the book and began reading. “Halfway down a bystreet of one of our New England towns stands a rusty wooden house, with seven acutely peaked gables, facing towards various points of the compass, and a huge, clustered chimney in the midst,” Eggsy began.

He just finished the third chapter when Harry’s snores began. He waited a few minutes to make sure that Harry was deeply asleep and would stay that way if Eggsy disentangled them, relishing in the heat of Harry curled up next to him. He wished it could have been under better circumstances but he was here, curled up with Harry- a place he’d yearned to be. He didn’t want to leave but he knew that if he stayed just another minute, he would be joining Harry in the land of sleep and he couldn’t risk that.

He set the book down and carefully set about removing himself from Harry’s embrace. Harry did not stop snoring and Eggsy felt the relief wash down his back like a tidal wave.

“Sleep well, Harry.”


	5. Chapter 5

Two days later

Eggsy had wanted nothing more than to get back to Harry but Merlin had had them on the ropes for two whole days. There wasn’t a single moment he could steal away, even in the middle of the night. He was unconscious until the mornings, body unable to cope with Merlin’s tasks and no sleep.

At the moment, it was Percival who had them outside, exercising until they thought they’d die. Again.

“Another twenty of those and then I want fifty push-ups,” Percival said, glancing at the struggling recruits from over the top of his book. “Then the real fun begins.”

“Fuckin’ hell,” Charlie growled as he struggled to pull himself back up to the bar.

“Seventy for you, Charlie,” Percival said from behind the book.

Eggsy glanced at Roxy.

“Magic,” she mouthed. Eggsy had to agree. There was no way that Percival was human. He had ears like a bat, eyes like a hawk, and a punch that everyone was sure could break concrete. He could run a marathon distance and not break a sweat. They’d not see him stop a bullet but it wasn’t that farfetched of an idea for Percival. The man was fucking superman.

Eggsy nearly dropped to the ground as Merlin appeared on the grounds and began walking toward them, steps purposeful and quick. His face looking much less wan and the circles under his eyes were less severe.

_Still a good sign._

Merlin spoke quietly to Percival all the while looking at Eggsy. He didn’t look upset but Eggsy felt as though ice water had been injected into his spine. He nearly dropped from the bar.

_What happened? Has something happened to Harry? Have I been found out?_

“Alright,” Percival said a couple of minutes after Merlin had gone back inside the manor and they were all lying on the grass, panting. “A break. The magician’s orders. Something about you not being immortal yet. You have two hours. Take your dogs, go get some water, take a nap, have a cry, do what you need to. Then you will all meet a mentor for a few hours.”

“Feel sorry for the sap who gets him,” Charlie whispered. Eggsy barely heard him, despite being two feet from the man. Percival was yards away.

“Charlie, you’ll be with me,” Percival said as he stood. “Meet me on the grounds. I feel like a bit of a run. I only got twelve miles in this morning.”

Charlie whimpered. Roxy and Eggsy hid their grins as they both reached their puppies and unhooked their leashes from the ground hooks. Roxy’s poodle, Arnold, fell into step with her while JB rolled over and asked for belly rubs. Eggsy, being the sucker he was, acquiesced.

They all dispersed under the watchful eye of Percival. He caught Eggsy’s gaze and ever so slightly tilted his head toward where Merlin had gone back in.

Eggsy inclined his head in understanding so Percival turned and glided away.

Merlin was waiting for him and immediately Eggsy wanted to crawl away and hide under something protective. Like an underground, reinforced bunker. He scooped up little JB and followed dutifully.

_Merlin knows. Hopefully I’ll at least get to keep JB. I could sneak him out in me pocket. Maybe he’ll let me say goodbye to Harry. Oh, fuck, fuck! Merlin knows and I’m done for. He's going to kill me.  
_

Merlin had to know why else would he be leading Eggsy down to the infirmary? Right to Harry’s room?

_Oh god, what if something happened to Harry? Oh god. Fuck. Fuck. FUCK!_

Merlin motioned him to go in and Eggsy hesitated but Merlin reached out, grabbed his arm, and propelled him into the room.

Harry was in the bed, looking a hundred times better. His eyes weren’t bloodshot and the bruise-like circles under his eyes had faded to mere hints of darkness. He was a far cry from the man Eggsy had found two nights ago.

“Eggsy!” Harry greeted, grinning. “Dear me, is it raining or are you that sweaty?”

“Percival,” Eggsy said in a way of explanation.

“Ah,” Harry said with a nod. “He’s quite merciless.”

“He’s a fuckin’ machine,” Eggsy said. He looked over his shoulder to make sure the man hadn’t appeared behind him. Merlin was gone from the hall. “He and Merlin both are like fuckin’ magicians. They appear outta nowhere!”

“I assure you I will let you know if either materializes behind you, lest you say something to earn you a sprint around the whole of London.”

“Or getting put to death.” Eggsy took a seat. “How are you?”

“Better, much more rested” Harry said, acknowledging their previous encounter. He did not seem to hold any qualms or embarrassment about it and it pleased Eggsy. “I am nearly about to die of boredom,” he continued. “And Merlin won’t give me tea. Did you bring tea?”

“No,” Eggsy laughed. “And before you ask, no I won’t get you any.”

Harry harrumphed but it wasn’t serious.

“I could read to you some more?” Eggsy tried.

Harry considered it.

“You could help me escape. Then I could get my own tea.”

“I sure as shit ain’t gonna help you escape,” Eggsy said. The words came out harsher than he intended. He took a deep breath to calm himself before he spoke again. “You ain’t ready to be up yet, Harry.”

“I want to be,” Harry said with a sigh. “I can’t even read my bloody book.”

“I know,” Eggsy said. He took Harry’s hand between his own. “But you ain’t ready. This stuff takes time. You’ve got to be patient with yourself. You ain’t just got a broken toe or somefin’, Harry. You was in a _coma._ For weeks. And they really ain’t sure why. Give yourself some time to heal up right. So please, promise me that you won’t try and do anything more than they tell you to. ”

Harry looked at him. There was that _fondness_ again.

“Gentlemen keep promises, don’t they?” Eggsy questioned.

“Yes, a gentleman always keeps true to his word.”

“So then promise me? Please? Promise me you won’t try an’ escape or leave the bed or do anythin’ that you ain’t supposed to.”

Harry gave an exaggerated sigh.

“I suppose I can do that for you, dear boy.”

“That wasn’t a promise,” Eggsy countered. He knew how twisting words worked and he was damned if he was going to let Harry get away with it.

“I promise,” Harry said, holding eye contact with him so the honesty was clear. “I promise, dear boy.”

“Thank you.” Eggsy grabbed the book off the table. “Where was we. Oh yeah, chapter four.”

Harry drifted off halfway through chapter seven. Merlin stepped back in just as Eggsy set the book down and managed to scare Eggsy right out of the chair into the floor. He'd forgotten that Merlin had even brought him down here.

_Fucking magician!_

“You passed,” he said in greeting.

“Huh? This was a test?” Eggsy took the proffered hand and Merlin pulled him up.

“I needed to make sure you wouldn’t let him win despite his charms.” Merlin looked at him carefully. The hair on the back of his neck rose and he felt the sudden urge to run and hide. “He’s in a delicate way right now, Eggsy. He has to rest and he can’t overexert himself. Head injuries like his are very tricky. Add in that we are nae really sure why he was in a coma- well we’re a bit protective. So I needed to make sure that your being here didn’t put him at risk.”

“Makes sense,” Eggsy said, nodding. “I don’t want him hurt, guv. I ain’t gonna do anythin’ that would hurt him.”

“Not intentionally,” Merlin said. “Of that I have no doubts. I just had to be sure that you would act in his best interest despite your own feelings.”

“My feel…” Eggsy felt like he might faint. He grabbed for the chair and sat down heavily.

 _Merlin knows!_ _Oh god, here it comes. Goodbye Kingsman._

“Eggsy, I have surveillance on every inch of this building. You honestly think I didn’t know when you were down here?”

Eggsy’s face heated up to nearly boiling and he looked down at his feet.

“You- you never said.”

“Because you never got caught otherwise,” Merlin said. Eggsy thought there was a touch of pride in the man’s tone. “You haven’t let it interfere in your training. It was all rather impressive. So I decided to let it lie.” He motioned to the closet. “I honestly expected you to crack two nights ago but you didn’t so much as make a sound. If I hadn’t already known you were in there- I’d not have known.”

“So, I’m not in trouble?” Eggsy nearly flinched at his own question, aware that he could be reminding Merlin that he _needed_ punishing.

“No,” Merlin said. “You’ve proven to be a help rather than a hindrance.” Merlin gave a pointed look where Harry was sleeping soundly. “You can continue to visit but, Eggsy,” Merlin said, hardening his gaze. “You can visit only if you don’t start to enable that bastard to injure or overexert himself. You must continue to not let it interfere with your training or health. You cannae ask Harry anything about Kingsman training. Harry does not have anything to say about your acceptance as Lancelot but this must all be kept undisclosed because there would be talk of impropriety and favoritism and those are very hard to counter.”

Eggsy nodded eagerly. He could abide by those rules.

“I will have everything on file, so believe me, _I will know_. There is one more thing, you _must_ stay out of Arthur’s sight. You cannae be caught down here, you understand?”

“Okay,” Eggsy said. “I swear I won’t let him see me. So I can really come and see Harry?”

“Yes, you overgrown puppy,” Merlin said on a sigh that helped him hide his grin. “But the moment you break just one of those rules, you’ll be running laps until your legs fall off and Harry will be completely off limits.”

Eggsy frowned only when Merlin mentioned no Harry.

“Deal,” Eggsy said, sticking his hand out.

_I can come see Harry and Merlin won't kill me! Thank fuck!_

“You have an hour to sit here and look at his ugly mug and then I expect you showered and back with the group,” Merlin said and shook Eggsy hand. As he left he was murmuring something about stubborn bastards and puppies.

Eggsy watched Harry’s eyes flick under the thin lids as he dreamed until it was time to go.


	6. Chapter 6

It was four more days before Eggsy had a chance to get back to Harry. They had been given the afternoon off and most of the other recruits were outside, enjoying the rare warm sunshine. Eggsy left JB with Roxy and Arnold underneath a Cherry tree and set off.

Merlin was in the room, arguing with Harry when Eggsy stepped inside.

“Why haven’t you brought me a razor?” Harry asked. His voice was still raspy but there was no mistaking the disdain. “I have a fucking beard. I hate beards. They’re itchy and unbecoming.”

“Not really your look, bruv,” Eggsy said from the door. He watched, pleased, as Harry’s face lit up at the sight of him. “It’s a bit much, innit?”

“Eggsy,” Harry said. “Good Christ, please get me away from Merlin.”

Eggsy sat down in the chair next to Harry’s bed and looked between the two men.

“What- you tired of Merlin already?” Eggsy gave a cheeky grin. “Can’t believe that, bruv.”

“He won’t let me shave,” Harry sulked.

“He tired of me about twenty years ago,” Merlin said with an exasperatedly fond sigh. “I told you he’d bitch about the beard.”

“ _I want to shave_.”

“Harry, you’re fucking trembling. The last thing I need is you to slice an artery open, you bastard.”

“You shave it then,” Harry said.

Merlin looked as though Harry had just insulted his mother. And grandmother. And ran over his cat. Twice.

“I am not shavin’ your fuckin’ face, Hart,” he spluttered. “ You can wait until tomorrow when Elliot can come down and cut the greasy rug on your head as well.”

“He’s just jealous because I can grow hair,” Harry said to Eggsy. “Bald bastard.”

“If you don’t…” Merlin growled.

“I’ll shave ya,” Eggsy offered, interrupting Merlin’s impending rant. If it would help Harry feel better, Eggsy would burn the world down. Shaving his face? That was too easy with the added bonus of getting to touch Harry. Sign him up twice.

Both Merlin and Harry stopped glaring at each other to look at him.

“Really?” Harry asked. Eggsy heart clenched at how absolutely hopeful Harry looked.

“Yeah,” Eggsy shrugged. “I ain’t gonna touch your hair with scissors because I ain’t got a death wish or nuthin’, but I can give you a bit of a shave.”

Merlin wordlessly stepped over to the sink and pulled out a shaving kit.

“Don’t kill him,” Merlin said when he handed it to Eggsy. “We just got the bearded bastard back and I’m not in the mood to have him bitch at me twice about a beard. Or lack of tea.”

“May I have tea now?” Harry perked up.

“No!” Merlin snapped but there was mirth in his eyes. Relief too, Eggsy could see. “Listen, I have to go do my job. Eggsy, you’ve got a couple of hours. Don’t be late for tea.”

“Yes sir.”

Eggsy set about gathering a bowl of water and some towels all the while feeling Harry’s eyes follow him.

He applied the shaving cream to Harry’s face, fingers lingering on warm skin. A straight razor lay in the kit and Eggsy felt a brief flash of worry.

“It’ll be fine,” Harry said. “Smooth and steady is all. I trust you. Please get this dead animal off of my face. It positively _itches._ ”

Eggsy sat on the edge of the bed for better reach and took a deep breath before pressing the blade against Harry’s skin. He pulled it down gently, the hair falling away smoothly under the sharpness of the blade. He worked slowly, being sure he didn’t miss a spot and that he didn't nick Harry.

Harry’s eyes were closed in contentment and his hand rested against Eggsy’s leg, warm and grounding. When Eggsy had gotten Harry's cheeks free from the beard, Harry leaned his head back, baring his neck to Eggsy.

A heady feeling rushed over Eggsy and his breath stuttered in his chest, knowing that Harry, _Harry Hart,_ trusted him enough to bare his neck to him and the razor. There wasn’t a moment of hesitation, not a single blip on Harry’s part before he let Eggsy run the razor down toward the column of his throat.

That trust was more than Eggsy could have anticipated. Sure the man had no reason to distrust him but there was still something very intimate, beyond trust in this maneuver. Eggsy attempted not to dwell on the feeling worming warmth down his spine and instead focused on the rest of Harry’s face. When he pressed the warm towel to Harry’s face and Harry sighed in happiness, Eggsy preened.

“Thank you,” Harry said when the towel had cooled and Eggsy removed it. He patted on a bit of aftershave and Harry nearly rubbed into his hands like a cat.

“You’re welcome, Harry,” Eggsy said. “So when you getting’ outta here?”

“Not for a while, I’m afraid,” Harry said. “Morgana wants to run some more tests. If I pass all of her tests with flying colors, I’ll get to see something other than this infernal room once again. I’ll have a few weeks of physical therapy before I’m allowed back into the field in full capacity. All this lying around hasn’t done me well.” He lifted his quivering hands as evidence.

“She’s right terrifying, yeah, Morgana?”

“You have no idea, dear boy,” Harry said. “She makes Percival look like a kitten.”

“I might have an idea,” Eggsy said. “I heard her threaten Merlin a few nights back. Anyone who can threaten Merlin and get away with it scares the fuck outta me.”

Eggsy stood up and returned the supplies to cabinet, dumping out the cooled water and washing the aftershave off of his hands.

“I suggest if you’re ever injured to do exactly as she says otherwise you’ll wake up strapped to a bed with the worst opera you can imagine playing in the background.”

“You don’t like opera?”

“Christ on a bicycle, _no._ Makes me want to pry my eardrums out with spoons.”

“Huh. I am partial to German operas meself.”

Eggsy felt Harry’s stare burning into the back of his head. He turned and laughed aloud at Harry’s look of pure horror.

“I’m jokin’, Harry. I fuckin' hate opera. A bunch of people scream-singing in a foreign language so I have to read somethin’ to know what’s goin’ on? Nah, mate. Give me a film or a play any day. Though not musicals. No one sings that much in real life.”

“I had a dream you sang to me,” Harry said offhandedly. “It was very beautiful.”

Eggsy froze.

_He’d heard that? How had he…? Oh fuck._

“I wish I could recall the words,” Harry said. “Just have a bit of the tune. Eggsy, what’s the matter? You’ve gone pale.”

“I, uh, I did sing to you one night,” Eggsy said, glancing a look at Harry. He looked perplexed and fond all at the same time.

“You did?”

“Mhm,” Eggsy agreed, looking away. “I, well, yeah.”

_What do I say now?! Fuck._

Harry seemed to sense his turmoil. He smiled.

“Well seems as though it wasn’t a dream after all. I would very much like to hear you sing again sometime,” Harry said, the end nearly forming into a question.

“Sure,” Eggsy said, taking a deep breath. “I could do tha’.”

There was a bottle of lotion on the side of the sink. Eggsy picked it up and returned to Harry’s side.

“I know how hospitals can make ya hands dry,” Eggsy said, changing the subject. “Thought maybe I might…?”

Harry smiled and held out his hand. Eggsy gently worked the lotion in around the IV port and then worked it into Harry’s palm, digging in at the pressure points. Harry’s hands had always caught Eggsy’s attention- large, powerful, and yet somehow soft, save for the gun calluses.

“Thank you,” Harry smiled as the last of the lotion was absorbed and Eggsy lowered his hand back to the bed. There was the _heated_ _fondness_ again and Eggsy blushed.

“You’re welcome, Harry.” Eggsy sighed as he caught sight of the clock. “Fuck, I gotta go.”

Without thinking, Eggsy leaned forward and kissed Harry’s forehead.

“See you soon, Harry!” Eggsy called as he raced out the door.

It wasn’t until later that night he realized what he’d done.

_Fuck!  
_


	7. Chapter 7

Another two days went by before Eggsy could get away to see Harry. To say he was a bit worried would be the understatement of the fucking year. He hadn’t slept well at all, tossing and turning enough that JB had nipped at his ankles at his displeasure of being bounced around on the bed.

_What if Merlin took it the wrong way? What if Harry hadn’t liked Eggsy’s affection? What if he told Eggsy that he didn’t fancy him in that way?_

_Well fuck it._

He wanted Harry in whatever way he could have him- better to find out now, yeah? See where they stand. He would be upset but he could deal with it. He could respect Harry and take whatever the man wanted to give. And Merlin hadn’t come at him with a butcher knife or hand grenade so he assumed it was safe.

He walked down the hall to settle this all once and for all. See what was going to become of them as a them. Eggsy squared his shoulders and walked into the room.

“Eggsy!” Harry greeted from the floor. His hair was damp and he was in a dark red robe over a pair of cream silk trousers. It would have been refreshing to see him out of the standard hospital garb except Eggsy’s brain went straight to panic at the sight of Harry _on the fucking floor._ “Dear boy, glad to see you.”

“ _Harry_?!” Eggsy yelled. “What the fuck happened?!”

“I’m alright,” Harry said, sheepishly.

“Easy, boyo,” Merlin said from the chair. “He’s tryin’ to prove a point and I’m letting him fail spectacularly.”

_Why the FUCK is Harry is on the floor and he's just sittin' there?_

“What fuckin' point, Merlin!?” Eggsy demanded. He took a deep breath to calm down. He didn't need to yell at Merlin. While he had come to realize that while Merlin was a ruthless trainer, he was actually a rather nice guy, if a bit gruff around the edges, he still didn't want to piss him off because the man still could make Eggsy's life worse than hell.

Merlin seemed amused by Eggsy's reaction rather than pissed. Thank fuck for small mercies.

“That he was fit enough to get from the shower to the bed unsupervised," Merlin explained. "Well, I was supervising and he still couldn’t manage it.”

“Harry?” Eggsy turned his attention to Harry.

“I’m alright,” Harry said again. “Just some bruised pride.”

“And quite possibly a bruised arse,” Merlin said. “He did a bit of bouncing to land that way.”

Eggsy growled his displeasure.

“Did, did you just _growl_?” Harry asked with a poorly disguised smile. Merlin just looked on in amusement.

“Yeah, I did,” Eggsy said, crossing his arms. “I'm debatin' which of you I want to sic Morgana on first.”

“Him,” they both said, pointing at the other.

“Well I’ve not made up me mind yet. Harry, you really alright?”

“A bit sore,” Harry admitted. “Not really sure I can get vertical again without getting dizzy so I may require some help.”

“Holy shit,” Merlin breathed. “You just admitted that. Out loud. In front of _people._ In front of _me._ ”

“Eggsy asked,” Harry whined. “He asked and I told him.”

“You’re fucked, Hart,” Merlin said. He grinned and Eggsy suddenly got the impression of a cat that had just gotten the cream. Possibly by using a hand grenade.

Eggsy watched as Merlin pulled Harry up as though the taller man weighed nothing. He was gentle, careful in his movements as he lowered Harry into the chair he’d just vacated. He pulled the IV pole over and set about inserting the line back into the port on the back of Harry’s hand.

“Now,” Merlin said, dragging the wheeled table over to him. “Eat your fucking broth.”

Before anyone could say another word Merlin’s tablet pinged. His eyes scanned it before his face fell.

“Eggsy do you think you can get Harry back into the bed when he’s finished? I’ve got to go.” He looked at Harry. “Gawain’s just been compromised.”

“Yeah,” Eggsy said. “I’ve got him, guv.”

“Be upstairs in an hour,” Merlin called over his shoulder as he raced out of the room. Eggsy turned back to Harry.

Harry glared at the bowl on the table and crossed his arms carefully. If the ceramic were a person, Eggsy was convinced it would be cowering or running for cover under the nearest table.

“Did it insult your Mum?” Eggsy asked. “Jesus, Harry, you’re lookin’ at it like it threatened your family. Is it not good?”

He stepped over and the warm smell of wonderfully seasoned chicken broth filled his nostrils. So it wasn’t bad, but Harry was clearly angry at it.

“My bloody hands won’t stop fucking shaking,” Harry groused. “And I don’t want to make a mess. I’ve just showered.”

Eggsy was going to rib the man about being too posh to make a mess like regular people but Harry’s expression warranted his silence. He looked around for a moment before grabbing Merlin’s leftover mug. He rinsed it in the sink and poured Harry’s soup into it.

“Now, drink up,” Eggsy said. He sat down on the edge of the bed. “Why are you looking at me like tha?”

Harry shook his head but the look on his face didn’t go away. It was fondness layered with, if Eggsy had to guess, longing. He watched Eggsy over the rim of the mug and Eggsy returned the gaze.

“You are something else, dear boy.” Harry set the mug down. “Something else entirely.”

Eggsy’s cheeks heated up and he had to look away. The fondness was back in full force.

“Would you mind helping me back to bed?” Harry asked. “I am afraid I am about at the end of my endurance.”

Eggsy eased the taller man up, careful of his IV line, guiding Harry’s arms over his shoulders. Harry’s legs, once underneath him, held him up but he tilted right viscously. His face pinched and he closed his eyes and Eggsy guessed the room moved around him.

“Whoa,” Eggsy said, counteracting Harry’s lean. “You’re right crooked, ain’t ya?”

“No one’s ever accused me of being straight,” Harry said offhandedly, holding onto Eggsy’s shoulders as he baby-stepped the man to the bed.

Eggsy’s cheeks blushed scarlet.

_Harry was- what was Harry saying? Was he just casually mentioning that? Was it a joke? Was he fishing for a response?_

He got Harry back into the bed and then went over to the sink to busy himself with rinsing out the bowl and mug to give him something to do rather than wring his hands like some classic novel heroine.

_Was now the time to tell Harry? How? Was he just joking? Could he be looking for a clue? How do I… fuckin’ hell._

“I did not mean to offend you,” Harry admitted quietly. “I do apologize. If you would be amendable, we could pretend I never said that.”

“What?”

“I suppose I misread the signals,” Harry said. He was studiously looking at the blanket in his lap. “I might have been projecting my hopes onto you and… oh hell. Listen, Eggsy. I apologize. Please, let’s just forget that I said anything.”

“Harry, what are you on about?”

“We’re obviously on different pages in regards to what we’re looking for in this relationship. I don’t think it wise that I continue to exploit your hospitality and kindness.”

Eggsy felt sick. He grabbed the edge of the sink to keep his knees from giving out and spilling him onto the floor. So Harry wasn’t looking for anything more? He didn’t want Eggsy around anymore?

“Harry-“ Eggsy started but the older man shook his head.

“I- I don’t- Eggsy could you give me some time, please?” He hadn’t looked up.

Eggsy felt his heart cracking open. It was surely pouring out onto the floor. He couldn’t breathe.

“Take all the time you need, Harry,” he said. He pushed off the sink toward the door. “I’ll not bother you anymore.”

“No,” Harry said. “I don’t want- please don’t leave. Just- just let me gather my thoughts, if you’d be so kind?”

Eggsy nodded before he took a seat. His heart was drumming violently in his chest he was sure it might just break his ribs. It felt like a those cartoons he watched as a kid, where the heart popped in and out of the chest, wildly, with no thought to the skin or organs around it. He was sure Harry could see it, if the man would just look up at him.

“I apologize again,” Harry said after minutes of tense silence. “I did not mean to offend you.”

“Harry,” Eggsy said. “You didn’t offend me.”

“You-“ Harry started but trailed off, looking upset.

“Got nervous because I was tryin’ to figure out if you was just makin’ a joke or if you was lookin’ for a clue from me. I was tryin’ to figure out how to drop me own clue.”

“Oh,” Harry said, suddenly looking hopeful again.

“Yeah,” Eggsy said, rubbing the back of his neck. “Yeah- I… I wanted to drop a clue and I didn’t know how. I ain’t exactly perfectly straight meself.”

“Well this changes things,” Harry said. “I- I- wow.”

“I’ve rendered Harry Hart speechless,” Eggsy grinned. “Someone call the papers.”

“Shut up, dear boy,” Harry said with mock annoyance.

“How does this work?” Eggsy asked. “I mean- we’re… I’m trying out for a position. How do we do…?”

“We cannot as you say, ‘do’ anything until the trials are completed. After that, if you are Lancelot, you and I have no rules barring our fraternization so long as we keep it professional at work and well out of Arthur’s know. If you are not Lancelot, well stuff the rules because they would not apply. We would not be under Arthur’s eyes at home.”

“So,” Eggsy said, getting excited. “What you’re sayin’ is that no matter what happens, no matter if I become a spy or not, I could kiss you? I could wake up to your face on the next pillow? You and I could, be togetha’?”

“Yes, dear boy,” Harry said, smiling as though he’d been given the world. “But you must finish the trials.”

Eggsy grabbed Harry’s hand and pressed his cheek into the palm.

Merlin walked in seconds later.

“Gawain alright?” Harry asked. His fingers gently rubbed against Eggsy’s cheek.

“Yes. He’s on a plane back to us as we speak. The threat was dealt with, much in Gawain’s preferred method.”

Eggsy looked at Merlin. Harry’s hand dropped to cover his on the bedspread.

“Explosions. The man’s a complete Pyromaniac.”

Eggsy grinned.

“And that grin tells me that should you become Lancelot, I will _never_ place you two on mission, let alone the same _continent_. I’ve seen your proclivity for the fireworks meself, lad.”

Eggsy grinned harder.

“So,” Merlin said. “So I gather you’ve settle where you stand, or wish to stand as it were, but to guarantee that no one can claim anything untoward or that there was favoritism, Eggsy, you have to stay away. And I mean, _away._ No more sneaking in.”

Harry didn’t seem bothered by Merlin’s omniscience presence so Eggsy bit back his complaint at Merlin’s intrusion on their conversation. He should have remembered Merlin’s comment from earlier. The man had eyes, and ears, everywhere.

“Harry, your boy has some skill,” Merlin said with an approving nod. “Managed to sneak in here on multiple occasions without alerting anyone but me and my cameras.”

Harry looked extremely proud and Eggsy preened again.

“Well done, dear boy.”

“Thanks, Harry.”

“Now that you’ve gone all gooey-eyed again,” Merlin said. “Seriously, Eggsy, you cannot come down here anymore unless permission is granted in an official capacity, alright? Arthur is going to be around more at this time and we cannot risk discovery.”

“What the deal there?” Eggsy questioned.

“He’s an old fashioned homophobe,” Harry said with a sad shrug. “Doesn’t mind sending people out on honeypots to gather information but the thought of two members of the same sex actually caring for and loving another is wrong, and a complete disgrace. He has no idea that I’m anything but straight.”

Anger sparked in Eggsy’s gut and he wanted nothing more than to punch Arthur in the old smushed face. Harry did not deserve to hide who he was from anyone, King of the Round Table or not. He wouldn’t jeopardize anything by going after Arthur, he wasn’t stupid. But that didn’t mean he couldn’t imagine sending Arnold after him or pushing him into a lake full of snakes or down into a dungeon full of hungry lions. Or sending him on a run with Percival. He shook himself out of the daydream.

_If Merlin has the entire place under surveillance and Arthur is king…_

“Won’t Arthur look at the video feeds?”

“Arthur doesn’t know how to check his own email without help,” Merlin said. “I see no reason the man would think to look at this footage, let alone be able to get past my firewalls without me. After the trials are complete and I am satisfied that no favoritism or unacceptable behavior has been performed, I will delete the footage and things will be fine.”

_Why would Merlin do this?_

“Why?” Eggsy asked, curiosity winning out over his self-preservation skills.

“Well I'm not a heartless bastard and because despite Harry being a stroke-inducing bastard, he is my closest friend,” Merlin said, sighing as though he’d been insulted. “I’m protecting him, lad. If you’re sneakin’ around here unaware, you put Harry at risk. So when I tell you to stay away…”

“You fuckin’ mean it. I won’t, Merlin,” Eggsy assured him. “I ain’t gonna do anyfin’ that will put Harry at risk.”

“Good, lad,” Merlin said. “Say your goodbyes and let’s go. I’ve got to go make sure that Charlie hasn’t managed to piss Percival off enough to warrant the man’s wrath. He was pushing buttons when I left the lab. Percival _hates_ that.”

Eggsy turned to Harry who looked up at him with warm tired eyes and a soft smile. Eggsy was missing him already and he hadn’t even left. There was so much to learn and to do and _Harry wanted him_!

The turmoil must have shown on his face.

“Dear boy,” Harry said. “We shall see each other soon. It will be alright.”

“I have to pretend like we… like wes just coworkers, yeah?”

“Yes,” Harry agreed. “For now.”

“Could, could I hug you now then?” Eggsy asked. “Just this once?”

Merlin shoved him in the direction of Harry with one arm. Harry opened his arms and Eggsy fell into them. He was warm and the hug was better than Eggsy could have ever imagined. Harry exerted the perfect amount of pressure, making Eggsy feel safe rather than smothered.

"I cannot wait to snog you senseless," Eggsy said into his neck.

"I think you'll find I will be snogging _you_ sensless," Harry responded. We will make this all work Eggsy. Don't fret, my sweet.”

“I like that," Eggsy said, pulling back to look at him. “I’m gonna make you proud, Harry.”

“You already have done, Eggsy.” Harry leaned forward and placed a soft kiss to the end of his nose. “I will be waiting, my sweet, dear boy.”

Eggsy squeezed Harry once more, pressing his face into the crook of Harry’s neck, inhaling the cozy smell of Harry’s skin. He smelled of crisp soap and something just Harry- an earthy sort of musk that Eggsy wanted to bury himself in and never leave. But he had to, if only for a while.

He and Harry would work it out, later. _They_ would and that gave Eggsy enough strength to pull back and press a soft peck to Harry's nose.

"Can't let JB be the only one kissin' ya," Eggsy joked.

Harry laughed as Eggsy stood up, squared his shoulders.

_Harry Hart and me. Together._

“Come on, lad,” Merlin said, opening the door. “It’s time.”

Eggsy walked out with his head held high, heart thumping wildly.

 

Calling that number on the back of the medal had been the best thing he had ever done.

But it certainly wasn’t going to compare to what he was going to do next.

 

 

* * *

But in the end if I'm with you   
I'll take the chance.  
Wherever you go  
Whatever you do  
I will be right here waiting for you.  
Whatever it takes  
Or how my heart breaks  
I will be right here waiting for you.

 _Waiting for you_.

* * *

 


End file.
